Last on MOTD: From somewhere near Fulham to somewhere near Wigan

IF it hasn’t been Chris Hollins or Sian Williams saying they’ll leave, or Victoria Derbyshire deciding to commute, it’s been Private Eye suggesting the whole thing’s a waste of money or Jeremy Clarkson decrying it as political correctness gone mad.

A long way from 1989

HERE’S a sign as to how far Manchester City’s standards and expectations have risen: When they beat United 5-1 at Maine Road in September 1989, Manchester Evening News correspondent Peter Gardner gave every City player 10 out of 10.

Twenty-two years and one even bigger victory later, current incumbent Stuart Brennan reserved his one perfect 10 for David Silva.

Joe Hart only got a seven. Then again, Darren Fletcher’s goal wasn’t as good as the volleyed scissors kick that Mark Hughes put past Paul Cooper.

Last on MOTD: Not at home

I WAS 27 when I decided I’d had enough of houseshares. Or perhaps my housemates decided they’d had enough of me. I forget.

Last on MOTD: Competition omission

QUIZ time: Who said this?

“I’ll tell you what a leading manager said to me the other day: ‘There are only two teams in the league – Manchester United and Liverpool. You can have the rest.’”

Don’t Roo the day

CAN I just get one thing straight here? Even with Wayne Rooney, England have just marginally more chance of winning Euro 2012 than I have of winning The Great British Bake Off.

An open letter to David Gower about the unfairness of the Super League play-off system

DEAR David Gower,

Hope you are well, and enjoying the fact that England have risen to the top of the Test cricket rankings. It is good to know that we are still the best in the world at something other than humiliating female hotel workers and attending dwarf throwing contests.

Classic Last on MOTD: 40 years of Motty

FACT: My local phone book (which, this year, has a lovely photograph of 1984 Olympic 100m hurdles silver medallist and self-confessed occasional smoker Shirley Strong on the front) does not contain a single Motson.

Last on MOTD: The Bendtner 52 non-mystery

THERE is, it turns out, no great mystery about Nicklas Bendtner’s squad number after all. This is extraordinary, really, given the lengths to which he went to change it from 26 to 52 at Arsenal a couple of years ago.