The winner takes it all

WE can now say, with a degree of certainty, that Roy Keane’s idea of a hellish night out would be an ABBA concert introduced by Jack Warner with a prawn sandwich buffet. At least, though, the Sunderland manager’s relationship with his own supporters has been well and truly repaired.

Last on MOTD: Half-a-dozen ghost goals

STUART Attwell was the fourth official at the Riverside yesterday. And West Brom striker Ishmael Miller’s response to that was to aim his best chance two feet outside the far post. It’s just disrespectful.

That’ll be another 32p, please

IT’S the level of detail in the reports of Sheffield United’s compensation claim against West Ham over That Carlos Tevez Thing which is particularly startling.

Blame it on Bogdanovic

EVERY so often, there’s a survey released which claims the vast majority of Britons are in the wrong job for their personality. I’m beginning to wonder if Alex Bogdanovic is one of them.

Last on MOTD: Man about the house

IT’S a long time since I’ve been to Ewood Park, despite growing up less than 10 miles away. When I last visited, the main stand was about half its current size, and the only place you could buy programmes was from a brick kiosk outside the ground.

League of surprises

I’VE a theory that the Championship springs up so many surprises, it should be sponsored by Cilla Black.

Goodbye, Respect

WHAT’S that disappearing over the horizon faster than a coward in a Western? Ah, that’ll be the Respect initiative.

Last on MOTD: The sound of no music

AN extraordinary Saturday for the Premier League! Berbatov! Keegan! Robinho! Zola! Walcott! And a Titus Bramble own goal.

All right with the kids

YOU know a football club has really hit the big time when Children’s BBC start sending a reporter to your press conferences.

Setanta rage

THERE are two myths that continue to pop up regarding the England/Setanta hoo-hah.